What would it be like to make yourself a priority?
What would it be like to carve out a space that's just for you? To not be last on your own to-do list? And what if you could do all that without guilt? The world needs a lot of healing, but you're part of this world too. In this course, I'm sharing how to prevent burnout: 8 steps to more sustainable caring.
Setting boundaries is not just about learning how to say no (although that's part of it!). It's also about making room to say yes. Yes to what nourishes you. Yes to what sustains you. Yes to the things that are most important to you. |
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Setting boundaries is really about listening to yourself. It involves rediscovering a relationship with all parts of you - body, heart, mind, and spirit. It starts with listening to your own inner wisdom, and then honoring it.
This online course is designed for social change makers and helping professionals. I thought of all the people I've worked with who care for others in their jobs or in their communities (activists, teachers, medical professionals, massage therapists, social workers, and therapists, for example) and how it's often so hard to do that work without burning out. I thought of all the people I know who are performing emotional labor in their most important relationships on a daily basis and who are exhausted from it. I wanted to create a course that could be accessed online and worked through at a pace that was right for each person. Drawn from years of clinical experience as a Registered Psychologist, I created this course to help challenge the idea that being a good person means everyone else should come before you.
This course is a fantastic space to find yourself again, and start living in a way that's more sustainable, authentic, and in line with your values.
What to Expect
This course includes all the same material as my live groups, broken down into 8 steps that you can spread out over as long as you like. I wanted to make it accessible for those who may not be able to make it to the live groups but are absolutely ready to carve out about an hour a week to work on boundaries. Or for those who like the idea of learning from the comfort of their own space. In the course, we start by reconnecting with our bodies and we aim to create a more sustainable way of relating to others. |
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Step 1: Get Clear on Why You Want This
First I'm going to help you get solid in understanding just exactly what a boundary is (and isn't!) by radically redefining the term. Look at how resentment, exhaustion, and burnout may already be impacting your life. Through a mindfulness-based exercise, understand your current relationship with boundaries and your reasons for doing the work.
Step 2: Make Whole-Body Decisions
Learn all about whole-body decision making and how it fits in with setting boundaries. Work through some decisions of your own and explore big questions like "what should I do when parts of myself are in conflict?", "how do I say no when there's still do much more work to be done?" and "how do I know the difference between self-care and self-sabotage?"
Step 3: Context, Context, Context!: Understand Your Own Boundaries
Learn more about your own physical, emotional, mental, and time boundaries in different areas of your life. Learn about the importance of context and how we can know when it's right for us to use passive, aggressive, or assertive behavior. (Hint: they all have a place!)
Step 4: The Struggle is Real: Release Beliefs That Are No Longer Serving You
Explore three of the most toxic messages women are given about boundaries and how they affect our worth. Get clear on the impact of these, and let go of the beliefs that are no longer serving you.
Step 5: Let Go of Guilt
Discuss what gets in the way of respecting our own boundaries and why it's so important to start with ourselves. Learn how to deal with guilt, fear, and numbing in new and creative ways.
Step 6: Get out of the Rescuer Role
Discover the internal signs that you're falling into a rescuer role, and learn how to take a step back while holding onto your compassion. Understand how sensitivity is a strength that we can learn to work with without burning out.
Step 7: Recognize & Recover from Burnout
Learn the signs of burnout and several concrete strategies you can use to create a more sustainable relationship with your helping role.
Step 8: Learn From Others, Start Moving Forward
Receive two guest interviews with Meg Berryman and Lily Le to help you learn from others doing work on boundaries. Gather ideas and resources to help you move forward with what you've learned.
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Lily Le is a doctoral candidate in counselling psychology and a Registered Provisional Psychologist in Edmonton, Canada. She is interested in promoting healthy relationships and wellbeing in her counselling, activist, and research work. Lily brings a feminist lens to all these spheres.To recharge, Lily enjoys dancing, weightlifting, and hanging out with her dog.
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Meg Berryman is a mother, feminist, coach, facilitator and yoga teacher who helps women liberate themselves from socially prescribed ideals + step into sacred, social leadership. She believes that burnout, relationship breakdowns and career crises are portals into deep individual and planetary healing that centers healthy relating, holistic wellness and earth stewardship. She brings together her 10+ years in social change work, her masters degrees in gender and public health and her experience as a yoga teacher, coach and facilitator to create learning experiences for women seeking radical wellbeing, deep connection and an unshakeable sense of purpose. She is a mother of two girls, and lives, learns and works on unceded Dja Dja Wurrung country in Central Victoria, Australia.
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How Can I Get the Most out of This Course?
In this 8 step course, the materials are designed to help you make whole-body decisions that are in line with your values. I offer new perspective that may help in working through fear, guilt, and other barriers to setting boundaries. I hope that each of you can find a way to move ahead with compassion - for the people you're in relationship with, and also for yourselves.
So, how do you get the most out of this course?
1. Know What to Expect In this course I mainly use audio recordings (including two guest interviews), though I also try to incorporate ideas you could try on your own, and I include some worksheets and guides, as I understand that people learn in different ways. If you're curious about the weekly theme, you can also have a closer look at the outline above. I also encourage people who don't already know me to have a listen to some of the podcast interviews I've recorded over the years or read articles I've written in order to get a sense of my style and my take on boundaries in order to make sure that we're a good match. I want you to be happy with the course and to feel like this is a full body yes!
2. Be Honest with Yourself About What You Need In terms of an online course, I think it's all too easy to convince ourselves that we'll fit it in "when we have time". If you're here because this is important to you, I'm going to suggest finding a way to specifically set time aside in the same you would for an in-person course or workshop. If it helps to put it in your calendar for a certain day and time each week, or make a commitment with a friend to do it, please do, Know for yourself what would help you the most in making this commitment to yourself and what will keep you going, even when other peoples' needs are calling to you.
3. Practice Making change takes practice, and so when we're working on things like saying no to people we care about, it can take time. I try to give optional adult homework that you can have to work on in between modules, and that way you'll get even more out of the course than just the time you spend listening to the audio. It may be helpful to think about how you can practice, integrate, or reflect on what you've learned after listening to the audio throughout the week. This might be a practice of listening to your body for 10 minutes each day, or a journalling reflection once a week, for example. Some days will be easier than others, of course, but over time you're likely to see more growth and healing by making this commitment. Keep in mind that healing doesn't happen overnight, and have patience with yourself.
2. Be Honest with Yourself About What You Need In terms of an online course, I think it's all too easy to convince ourselves that we'll fit it in "when we have time". If you're here because this is important to you, I'm going to suggest finding a way to specifically set time aside in the same you would for an in-person course or workshop. If it helps to put it in your calendar for a certain day and time each week, or make a commitment with a friend to do it, please do, Know for yourself what would help you the most in making this commitment to yourself and what will keep you going, even when other peoples' needs are calling to you.
3. Practice Making change takes practice, and so when we're working on things like saying no to people we care about, it can take time. I try to give optional adult homework that you can have to work on in between modules, and that way you'll get even more out of the course than just the time you spend listening to the audio. It may be helpful to think about how you can practice, integrate, or reflect on what you've learned after listening to the audio throughout the week. This might be a practice of listening to your body for 10 minutes each day, or a journalling reflection once a week, for example. Some days will be easier than others, of course, but over time you're likely to see more growth and healing by making this commitment. Keep in mind that healing doesn't happen overnight, and have patience with yourself.
Frequently Asked Questions
When does the course start and finish?
Since the course is all pre-recorded, it starts as soon as you're ready! Each module contains an audio lesson that is intended to be completed once a week, with optional adult homework and reflection questions in between the sessions.
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How long do I have access to the course?
The course is intended to be completed over 8 weeks, and most of my clients report the highest benefits if they carve out this intention space for themselves each week. That said, I know life can be unexpected, and you may need to skip a week and come back to the material the following week. After enrolling, you'll have access to this course for as long as you like - across any and all devices you own.
Are refunds available if I'm not happy with this course?
Nope. So, please make sure you're clear on what's involved in the course and ask me any questions if you have them!
Is this therapy?
This course is a non-interactive educational experience, which means it's not the same as therapy. It's not a substitute for therapy. If you find that the material brings up strong feelings or is connected with unprocessed trauma, I strongly encourage you to follow up with a therapist in your area. You may be able to find one through www.psychologytoday.com or www.therapyden.com (US only). At this time, I'm currently unavailable for new clients.
Since the course is all pre-recorded, it starts as soon as you're ready! Each module contains an audio lesson that is intended to be completed once a week, with optional adult homework and reflection questions in between the sessions.
.
How long do I have access to the course?
The course is intended to be completed over 8 weeks, and most of my clients report the highest benefits if they carve out this intention space for themselves each week. That said, I know life can be unexpected, and you may need to skip a week and come back to the material the following week. After enrolling, you'll have access to this course for as long as you like - across any and all devices you own.
Are refunds available if I'm not happy with this course?
Nope. So, please make sure you're clear on what's involved in the course and ask me any questions if you have them!
Is this therapy?
This course is a non-interactive educational experience, which means it's not the same as therapy. It's not a substitute for therapy. If you find that the material brings up strong feelings or is connected with unprocessed trauma, I strongly encourage you to follow up with a therapist in your area. You may be able to find one through www.psychologytoday.com or www.therapyden.com (US only). At this time, I'm currently unavailable for new clients.
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I'd love to give you the chance to get to know me more before jumping into a group or course. One of the best ways to do that (in addition to making your way through all the resources I've posted right here on the website) is by signing up for my newsletter to get a better sense of who I am and what to expect with me.
As a thank you for signing up, you'll receive a free copy of "5 Steps to Setting Boundaries". From there, I send out emails about a dozen times a year with handy guides I've created, information about the latest groups and workshops I'm offering, news about community resources, and a curated collection of the best articles and resources related to mental health from a feminist counselling perspective. If all that sounds good to you, just go through the link below. And remember, you can unsubscribe if it no longer works for you. |